umm.. let me just say for all you followers you don't comment much. this ain't no monologue people :)


So here's a collage of the life, err make that tweets lately. He most definitely uses trials and scary times to draw us. sanctify. and maybe even just sit us down so we can learn a little something.. like how to play the guitar.

joy unshaken.

whew. what a week. starting with a trip to the dr/orthopedic last friday. that big 'ole bruise I blogged about ended up being a little more than a bruise. my car is acting up and has to go to the shop. life isn't always as perfect as we'd like. a guy I graduated from hs with committed suicide. then an English teacher at my high school was shot and killed by her ex-husband. I've been fighting an incling to feel depressed. tempted to misplace my joy.

starting with my knee.. i'm pretty active, workout about 5-6days/wk. pretty intense plyo/run/weights/asylum/turbo... but with partial tears in your medial meniscus & ACL those things can't exactly happen. so super decreased in the endorphin levels. my joy mustn't change. I'm not paralyzed. I'm not dead. no cast. no surgery (yet). I am alive in Christ and no circumstance or satan can rob me of my joy.

and with the death of fellow CMHS foxes, even though I wasn't super close with either of them. they were still part of that family. life is a vapor, a breath. and even with that our hope is unshaken. and I wonder did I share that hope with those two? am I sharing the unchanging joy, peace, and hope that only comes from Jesus. Christ with my life everyday.
and with all the little things I could go on and on and complain about. or I could choose joy.



today I will choose joy. because I have a joy that is not shaken.

" Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." Romans 12:12

"Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire." Hebrews12:28

hope is beauty

I'm constantly being reminded of how much I need Him. big time. He will always be all my hope and satisfaction. relationships are hard. and they will never fill the void of our hearts. After a couple of chats about 1 Peter 3 around with the girls lately I decided to spend some time diggin on my own. and boy oh boy did I find a gem!!
Peter is talking to the wives and husbands here. (note: talking to the wifey here!) 1Peter3:3-5
"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful." yep there it is plain and simple: hope in God is beautiful. that was like the little twinkle diamond peering through the rock. chip a little further and you get this---the same words hope in God are seen in another scripture in 1 Timothy 5:5 "The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God and continues night and day to pray and to ask god for help, but the widow who lives for pleasure is dead even while she lives."
pause. let this sink. hope in God is the same for the wife as it is for the widow. a boy or husband doesn't and never will diminish that need. not one little bit. and if our life's aren't desperate for Him, we're dead even if our heart may beat. If our heart isn't connecting with His, no heartbeat is worth it.

I'm learning this. He's changing my heart. sanctifying.

I need Him. I need Him. I need Him.

broken heart. captured heart.

This morning I went to the Bridge of Lubbock (non-profit ministry located in East LBK. God's using them for sure). I wasn't scheduled to go there for class today, but had some extra time so I decided to go. and honestly I'll admit I was going more from the MOTS (master of occupational therapy student) stand point with a little kingdom sprinkled on top. These kiddos are super guarded and hard to build report with so I figured I'd need to go a little extra to gain some foundation with them. and oh how Jesus knows how to show Himself even when you're not straight up looking for Him.

I did do a little praying on the way over there. I got to east LBK 13th St. a little early. so of course the Spirit prompts me subconsciously. i thought eh, I'll drive around. see where these kids are from. where they live. my heart broke. tears rolled. He captured me there.

Most of you know I've been on trips. Belize. Guatemala. I've seen some poor and broken places. I've held the least of these. But my heart broke today in a totally different way. I was convicted. It was one of those moments that you feel like, "gah, we're (I'm) missing it." His love is needed 15 minutes away from my house. His redemption and power to make broken things new and whole has its place in the east side of the LBK. I think so often we (I!) don't want to go to those places because I can't jump on a plane and get away. there's no distance as an excuse. Don't get me wrong I will forever go and love places like Guatemala. My belief in God as the Lord and Savior of EVERY nation hasn't changed. He just used today to give me a broken heart, that it might be a captured heart by the things of Him, kiddos that are hungry for love, safety and security. to know a love that will free them to let down their guard and be safe in the arms of a loving faithful Father.

"Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed..." -Mark 5:34

summer groups leavin their mark

sorry its been a couple of weeks. for the one faithful reader (thanks mom!) This summer has been really nice, not much homework or studying, good things happening, and summer sun. just can't beat it. So I'm leading groups at the Children's Home and the Bridge of Lubbock for two of my classes. and man my eyes have been opened. big time. hurting, orphaned, abandoned and wounded kiddos right in my back yard. Its been such a blessing that I get to love on them as part of my school.


and while trying to leave a mark on their hearts last week, I got a mark left on my knee. when they said football, of course I immediately jumped the gun and said "heck yea I'm in" the boys kinda chuckled when they saw me walking out there, but didn't take long for them to realize I meant business. so we're in an intense flag football game. my team is on defense. big black 15 yr old athletic boy is bookin it with the ball. right in my territory. i step to grab that little flag and his knee and the inside of my have a not so nice introduction to each other. that thing swelled immediately. and kept swelling. and kept swelling. and now its super sore and a nice purple and blue color.




with a spiritual twist, it reminded me to make sacrifices and suffer. that every 15 yr old boy living in the inner city. and everywhere. would know the love of Christ. praying and asking Him to change my heart and life to live that out. sacrificing, suffering for the sake of every heart having their own collision with a love that leave permanent marks on our hearts.












oh btw, I got his flag.