the gospel is the good news. even after our justification and decision to follow Christ it continues to define who we are as believers. it is the foundation of our faith. I trusted Christ as my savior when I was 5 years old, I knew my life was pointless and empty without Him. I knew I needed Him. and now as a 21 year old I still know I need Him, maybe even know it more. Lately the Lord has been captivating my heart even more, simply with the gospel. He's resonated in my heart and mind leading me to be utterly overwhelmed with the truth of what He's done, what He's done and what He will continue to do to rescue, redeem and save.
here's a tidbit of that resonance.
He is high. exalted. Above all things. He was before all time began, He is the author of life. He is seated in the heavens surrounded by creatures that my mind can't even fathom and all creation joins to sing, Holy Holy Holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was and is and is to come.-Revelation4:8. He is 'I am' all I will ever need and more. He is omnipresent, omnipotent. wow. yes, that's who He is and I've only seen a glimpse of that glory. His majesty is unsurpassed.
We've been going through the book of John in our community group at the HSC. His life is beautiful. The day after I had the image of Him seated on His throne stuck in my head all day, community group, John 13, Jesus washes His disciples feet. wait, that God that I couldn't stop thinking about His holiness and majesty, that one came and washed feet. the feet of those who would betray Him. He came near, to our hearts. to wash the dirtiest parts of our lives. that we might partake of the life He gives. Lazurus from the dead, woman at the well, Nicodemus, blind healed, healing at the pool... the list goes on. How can we miss this? He came to bring us out of death into life. old made new. blind to see. slave-free. He turned over every religious status quo, He fulfilled the law. that we may have life, today (john10:10). "He rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins" Colossians1:13-14. and He didn't just do this one time, nope, over and over He delivers us. from daily sin, hurt, shame, rejection, pity, addiction.. everyday He sustains our life and breath and offers grace and hope and peace. "For He has delivered us from a deadly peril.... On Him we have set our hope, for He will continue to deliver." 2Corinthians1:10. A God who came near to pay my penalty on a cross that was technically mine to carry brings forth a love that is irresistably compelling. It moves me. opens and fixates my eyes, to gaze into His beauty. I refuse, I refuse to sit in contentment and not proclaim this gospel that is timeless and freeing. to go. to be, here. for those who have never heard, here and in unreached places of the world. and in the words of my friend who's agnostic and on her way to knowing Christ. "Jesus was a man of deep character and He loved beyond people's behaviors and backgrounds, He taught a love that brings change." and watching this love change her heart, my heart, brings me to surrender to give all of me for the kingdom who's keys are good news.
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Monday, October 10, 2011
never alone.
Every since I was probably 16 I always thought I'd be planning wedding about now. I thought I'd be married before or right after I graduated in May of 2012. But oh if I know anything its that our plans are not always His plans. He gloriously ruins to shape us and exalt His name in our lives. With May quickly (QUICKLY!!) approaching I'm starting to get lots of questions like "where are you going to live?" "what are you going to do?" all the fun questions that bring forth a lot of "i have no clue"
There are a lot of things I feel like the Lord is leading me to do with my life, like traveling OT, opening a coffee shop for ministry, adopt, etc. But if I'm completely honest I am straight up scared to death to do any of those things alone. It just seems like it'd be much easier to have a man to follow and let him make big decisions like where to live, etc. I didn't really understand how scared I was until this Sunday. I was driving to church, praying and preparing my heart for worship, as I was praying about my future the Lord spoke in a soft whisper, "you're never going alone" He knew my fears before I even knew them. Gah, He's so sovereign I can't even comprehend it. Knowing that I have no reason to fear I entered His presence seeking comfort and peace that He alone gives. worship at church was beautiful. Then when I was home alone, in the quiet, His voice began to demolish every little fear. check this-women in the bible that were heroes of the faith, Ruth, Tamar, Rahab, Mary. Umm how many of them were married?! uh-huh. there are very very few. Jesus came fulfilling prophecy of His lineage because of women like rahab, tamar and mary. The gospel came in perfection because of how God used single women. He is the source of all strength. What He calls us to do is only done in His power. I find hope and peace knowing that He will never leave me or forsake me. For that I will be courageous.
There are a lot of things I feel like the Lord is leading me to do with my life, like traveling OT, opening a coffee shop for ministry, adopt, etc. But if I'm completely honest I am straight up scared to death to do any of those things alone. It just seems like it'd be much easier to have a man to follow and let him make big decisions like where to live, etc. I didn't really understand how scared I was until this Sunday. I was driving to church, praying and preparing my heart for worship, as I was praying about my future the Lord spoke in a soft whisper, "you're never going alone" He knew my fears before I even knew them. Gah, He's so sovereign I can't even comprehend it. Knowing that I have no reason to fear I entered His presence seeking comfort and peace that He alone gives. worship at church was beautiful. Then when I was home alone, in the quiet, His voice began to demolish every little fear. check this-women in the bible that were heroes of the faith, Ruth, Tamar, Rahab, Mary. Umm how many of them were married?! uh-huh. there are very very few. Jesus came fulfilling prophecy of His lineage because of women like rahab, tamar and mary. The gospel came in perfection because of how God used single women. He is the source of all strength. What He calls us to do is only done in His power. I find hope and peace knowing that He will never leave me or forsake me. For that I will be courageous.
Thursday, August 11, 2011
the final thunder roll.
in my experience just when you think its all falling into place, it all falls apart. and as a believer when that happens I am not worried, shaken, or doubtful. but tempted to be all of those things? yes. I've already decided I will always be super careful in how I tell this story, in attempt to never pull down or point out any another believers. so without giving too much details, let me just say this...
For years I've been thinking the Lord was definitely calling me one direction and I've been waiting patiently (attempting the patient part) for those plans to come together. things were looking up, it seemed like the rain was clearing the dove was bringing a branch from the dry land.. and just as that came, so did the crashing thunder. that last roll at the end of the storm. the surprise. i cried like I haven't in years. the pit of my stomach felt like it turned inside out. i felt like a fool that had fallen in deceit. it hurts, its deep. but His voice whispers, "My grace is sufficient" I believe His word, Romans 8:28- He works every part for His glory. and He brings everything in conformity for the purpose of His will -Ephesians 1:11. So if you ever thought or think my life is easy. Its not. my flesh battles with bitterness, anger, confusion, questions and fear. and the beauty of the Spirit within us is that He fight backs all the more with love, joy, peace, grace and truth.
My heart's desire is to love Him more, be obedient to His call, and give everything for the sake of the gospel. and so I will continue. to love. to serve. and give, for the sake of the gospel, my only hope.
oh, btdub- new shane&shane stuff that's coming out soon is super good.
For years I've been thinking the Lord was definitely calling me one direction and I've been waiting patiently (attempting the patient part) for those plans to come together. things were looking up, it seemed like the rain was clearing the dove was bringing a branch from the dry land.. and just as that came, so did the crashing thunder. that last roll at the end of the storm. the surprise. i cried like I haven't in years. the pit of my stomach felt like it turned inside out. i felt like a fool that had fallen in deceit. it hurts, its deep. but His voice whispers, "My grace is sufficient" I believe His word, Romans 8:28- He works every part for His glory. and He brings everything in conformity for the purpose of His will -Ephesians 1:11. So if you ever thought or think my life is easy. Its not. my flesh battles with bitterness, anger, confusion, questions and fear. and the beauty of the Spirit within us is that He fight backs all the more with love, joy, peace, grace and truth.
My heart's desire is to love Him more, be obedient to His call, and give everything for the sake of the gospel. and so I will continue. to love. to serve. and give, for the sake of the gospel, my only hope.
oh, btdub- new shane&shane stuff that's coming out soon is super good.
Sunday, July 31, 2011
umm.. let me just say for all you followers you don't comment much. this ain't no monologue people :)
So here's a collage of the life, err make that tweets lately. He most definitely uses trials and scary times to draw us. sanctify. and maybe even just sit us down so we can learn a little something.. like how to play the guitar.
So here's a collage of the life, err make that tweets lately. He most definitely uses trials and scary times to draw us. sanctify. and maybe even just sit us down so we can learn a little something.. like how to play the guitar.
Thursday, July 21, 2011
joy unshaken.
whew. what a week. starting with a trip to the dr/orthopedic last friday. that big 'ole bruise I blogged about ended up being a little more than a bruise. my car is acting up and has to go to the shop. life isn't always as perfect as we'd like. a guy I graduated from hs with committed suicide. then an English teacher at my high school was shot and killed by her ex-husband. I've been fighting an incling to feel depressed. tempted to misplace my joy.
starting with my knee.. i'm pretty active, workout about 5-6days/wk. pretty intense plyo/run/weights/asylum/turbo... but with partial tears in your medial meniscus & ACL those things can't exactly happen. so super decreased in the endorphin levels. my joy mustn't change. I'm not paralyzed. I'm not dead. no cast. no surgery (yet). I am alive in Christ and no circumstance or satan can rob me of my joy.
and with the death of fellow CMHS foxes, even though I wasn't super close with either of them. they were still part of that family. life is a vapor, a breath. and even with that our hope is unshaken. and I wonder did I share that hope with those two? am I sharing the unchanging joy, peace, and hope that only comes from Jesus. Christ with my life everyday.
and with all the little things I could go on and on and complain about. or I could choose joy.
today I will choose joy. because I have a joy that is not shaken.
" Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." Romans 12:12
"Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire." Hebrews12:28
starting with my knee.. i'm pretty active, workout about 5-6days/wk. pretty intense plyo/run/weights/asylum/turbo... but with partial tears in your medial meniscus & ACL those things can't exactly happen. so super decreased in the endorphin levels. my joy mustn't change. I'm not paralyzed. I'm not dead. no cast. no surgery (yet). I am alive in Christ and no circumstance or satan can rob me of my joy.
and with the death of fellow CMHS foxes, even though I wasn't super close with either of them. they were still part of that family. life is a vapor, a breath. and even with that our hope is unshaken. and I wonder did I share that hope with those two? am I sharing the unchanging joy, peace, and hope that only comes from Jesus. Christ with my life everyday.
and with all the little things I could go on and on and complain about. or I could choose joy.
today I will choose joy. because I have a joy that is not shaken.
" Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." Romans 12:12
"Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire." Hebrews12:28
Sunday, July 17, 2011
hope is beauty
I'm constantly being reminded of how much I need Him. big time. He will always be all my hope and satisfaction. relationships are hard. and they will never fill the void of our hearts. After a couple of chats about 1 Peter 3 around with the girls lately I decided to spend some time diggin on my own. and boy oh boy did I find a gem!!
Peter is talking to the wives and husbands here. (note: talking to the wifey here!) 1Peter3:3-5
"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful." yep there it is plain and simple: hope in God is beautiful. that was like the little twinkle diamond peering through the rock. chip a little further and you get this---the same words hope in God are seen in another scripture in 1 Timothy 5:5 "The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God and continues night and day to pray and to ask god for help, but the widow who lives for pleasure is dead even while she lives."
pause. let this sink. hope in God is the same for the wife as it is for the widow. a boy or husband doesn't and never will diminish that need. not one little bit. and if our life's aren't desperate for Him, we're dead even if our heart may beat. If our heart isn't connecting with His, no heartbeat is worth it.
I'm learning this. He's changing my heart. sanctifying.
I need Him. I need Him. I need Him.
Peter is talking to the wives and husbands here. (note: talking to the wifey here!) 1Peter3:3-5
"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful." yep there it is plain and simple: hope in God is beautiful. that was like the little twinkle diamond peering through the rock. chip a little further and you get this---the same words hope in God are seen in another scripture in 1 Timothy 5:5 "The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God and continues night and day to pray and to ask god for help, but the widow who lives for pleasure is dead even while she lives."
pause. let this sink. hope in God is the same for the wife as it is for the widow. a boy or husband doesn't and never will diminish that need. not one little bit. and if our life's aren't desperate for Him, we're dead even if our heart may beat. If our heart isn't connecting with His, no heartbeat is worth it.
I'm learning this. He's changing my heart. sanctifying.
I need Him. I need Him. I need Him.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
broken heart. captured heart.
This morning I went to the Bridge of Lubbock (non-profit ministry located in East LBK. God's using them for sure). I wasn't scheduled to go there for class today, but had some extra time so I decided to go. and honestly I'll admit I was going more from the MOTS (master of occupational therapy student) stand point with a little kingdom sprinkled on top. These kiddos are super guarded and hard to build report with so I figured I'd need to go a little extra to gain some foundation with them. and oh how Jesus knows how to show Himself even when you're not straight up looking for Him.
I did do a little praying on the way over there. I got to east LBK 13th St. a little early. so of course the Spirit prompts me subconsciously. i thought eh, I'll drive around. see where these kids are from. where they live. my heart broke. tears rolled. He captured me there.
Most of you know I've been on trips. Belize. Guatemala. I've seen some poor and broken places. I've held the least of these. But my heart broke today in a totally different way. I was convicted. It was one of those moments that you feel like, "gah, we're (I'm) missing it." His love is needed 15 minutes away from my house. His redemption and power to make broken things new and whole has its place in the east side of the LBK. I think so often we (I!) don't want to go to those places because I can't jump on a plane and get away. there's no distance as an excuse. Don't get me wrong I will forever go and love places like Guatemala. My belief in God as the Lord and Savior of EVERY nation hasn't changed. He just used today to give me a broken heart, that it might be a captured heart by the things of Him, kiddos that are hungry for love, safety and security. to know a love that will free them to let down their guard and be safe in the arms of a loving faithful Father.
"Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed..." -Mark 5:34
Sunday, July 10, 2011
summer groups leavin their mark
sorry its been a couple of weeks. for the one faithful reader (thanks mom!) This summer has been really nice, not much homework or studying, good things happening, and summer sun. just can't beat it. So I'm leading groups at the Children's Home and the Bridge of Lubbock for two of my classes. and man my eyes have been opened. big time. hurting, orphaned, abandoned and wounded kiddos right in my back yard. Its been such a blessing that I get to love on them as part of my school.
and while trying to leave a mark on their hearts last week, I got a mark left on my knee. when they said football, of course I immediately jumped the gun and said "heck yea I'm in" the boys kinda chuckled when they saw me walking out there, but didn't take long for them to realize I meant business. so we're in an intense flag football game. my team is on defense. big black 15 yr old athletic boy is bookin it with the ball. right in my territory. i step to grab that little flag and his knee and the inside of my have a not so nice introduction to each other. that thing swelled immediately. and kept swelling. and kept swelling. and now its super sore and a nice purple and blue color.
with a spiritual twist, it reminded me to make sacrifices and suffer. that every 15 yr old boy living in the inner city. and everywhere. would know the love of Christ. praying and asking Him to change my heart and life to live that out. sacrificing, suffering for the sake of every heart having their own collision with a love that leave permanent marks on our hearts.
oh btw, I got his flag.
and while trying to leave a mark on their hearts last week, I got a mark left on my knee. when they said football, of course I immediately jumped the gun and said "heck yea I'm in" the boys kinda chuckled when they saw me walking out there, but didn't take long for them to realize I meant business. so we're in an intense flag football game. my team is on defense. big black 15 yr old athletic boy is bookin it with the ball. right in my territory. i step to grab that little flag and his knee and the inside of my have a not so nice introduction to each other. that thing swelled immediately. and kept swelling. and kept swelling. and now its super sore and a nice purple and blue color.
with a spiritual twist, it reminded me to make sacrifices and suffer. that every 15 yr old boy living in the inner city. and everywhere. would know the love of Christ. praying and asking Him to change my heart and life to live that out. sacrificing, suffering for the sake of every heart having their own collision with a love that leave permanent marks on our hearts.
oh btw, I got his flag.
Sunday, June 19, 2011
for the dad who deserves much more than a blog post
I am beyond blessed to have the dad that I do. Thomas Keith Davidson is his name, my nana named him that because she said she thought it sounded like a president's name. and no he's not the president and I don't really think he will be. He leads our family like the best in all of history and he's even become a big Red Raider Fan, he'll put his guns up with the best of 'em. He teaches us kids to laugh. I can't tell you how many times I've heard him say, "enjoy life" and he will tell you stories and jokes all night if you let him, just to make you laugh. It may be a story about him hunting without a license or catching a bat on the end of the fishing pole. or the time my brother said to him, "papa, don't spank me it makes me sick." the list goes on. He's wise in his words. 
Firm, but gentle. Having a dad like him, helps me fall in love with Jesus so easily. My dad calls me every day. our conversation usually includes the weather, latest sports news, my bank account, school, his work and whatever his latest project is. and speaking of his projects he works harder than any man I know. Our yard is freshly cut, full and thick. The tree lines get cleared. He builds little log cabin looking sheds for the lawn mower. plants anything and everything on our property, because my mom kills just about anything she touches lol. and when I'm home we play scrabble, go to football games, basketball tournaments and eat chinese food (its a daddy daughter thing. we laugh at the irony and he says, "i'm glad I had a daughter to fish and watch sports with me :) ) He always does whatever it takes to protect and provide. He is indeed a man after God's own heart.
Firm, but gentle. Having a dad like him, helps me fall in love with Jesus so easily. My dad calls me every day. our conversation usually includes the weather, latest sports news, my bank account, school, his work and whatever his latest project is. and speaking of his projects he works harder than any man I know. Our yard is freshly cut, full and thick. The tree lines get cleared. He builds little log cabin looking sheds for the lawn mower. plants anything and everything on our property, because my mom kills just about anything she touches lol. and when I'm home we play scrabble, go to football games, basketball tournaments and eat chinese food (its a daddy daughter thing. we laugh at the irony and he says, "i'm glad I had a daughter to fish and watch sports with me :) ) He always does whatever it takes to protect and provide. He is indeed a man after God's own heart. 
I've never questioned if he loves me- and for that I am super super thankful. my heart overflows. He's taught me to be disciplined. Work hard at whatever you do. Give God all the glory. Live your life worthy of the calling. to make wise decisions. and don't be afraid to ask the hard questions. Trust and be patient. our time here is but a breath, so enjoy.
Happy Father's Day!! I love you!
Thursday, June 16, 2011
the ones i like to call heart stealers.
Last night I got to go to Abilene to pop in for a visit at Super Summer HSU session 2.. Super summer is a christian leadership camp designed for "hard core" Jesus lovin youth. its jammed packed with lots of bible study, not much free time and some tough discussions. its the bay-est!! I've been to super summer as a student and as a TL.it made my heart super happy to see lots of old faces. and the worship at rainbow. good golly! i can't explain it, but the presence of the Lord definitely inhabits the praises of His kids there, always has and still does. its beautiful. As I saw kids that I had in groups running towards me, faces lit, I couldn't help but think man God, only by your grace doI get to have those moments and to continue loving like that on heart after heart. I definitely could love or engage like that without Him. I even saw sweet Laney. Laney is a really good friend of a sweet girl, named tessa. I met when I was umm idk 15/16 while tagging along with my mom at mt. Lebabnon. Tessa was shy, but God joined the heart of mine with my sister Tessa. I've seen Tessa and Laney a couple of times in the past 5 years, but its crazy to think after all that time, there's still a joy that floods both of our hearts and faces when we see each other.
my prayer, my heartbeat, my cry is that wherever my feet have walked and wherever they will walk- that they're always fitted with the readiness of the gospel of peace. and whatever life I walk into, when I do I hope they simply love Jesus more.
my prayer, my heartbeat, my cry is that wherever my feet have walked and wherever they will walk- that they're always fitted with the readiness of the gospel of peace. and whatever life I walk into, when I do I hope they simply love Jesus more.
Monday, June 13, 2011
marvelous monday. new week
In honor of it being a new week. I thought I'd share some of my new loves.. in no particular order....
1. a great NEW blog. easypeasycraft.blogspot.com
2. WHOLE cup (more to come later. but basically its coffee. orphans. mugs. OT. Loving.)
3.. From the wonderful World Market. It cost everything NOT to dream. and there are lots of new dreams floating in this brain of mine.
4."You make beautiful things" by Gungor.
and He gave me a real picture of the line "you make beautiful things out of the dust" I was driving and a huge dust storm was coming into LBK, seriously they even put a warning on the TV! after I was at home inside, safe from the dirt. I was listening to this song and thought, wow. what a BIG redeeming God we have, that He can and does make beautiful things out of something so worthless and dirty like the dust.
Dallas Mavericks took care of business. seriously! and I just might name my first kid Jett. don't hate.
1. a great NEW blog. easypeasycraft.blogspot.com
2. WHOLE cup (more to come later. but basically its coffee. orphans. mugs. OT. Loving.)
3.. From the wonderful World Market. It cost everything NOT to dream. and there are lots of new dreams floating in this brain of mine.
4."You make beautiful things" by Gungor.and He gave me a real picture of the line "you make beautiful things out of the dust" I was driving and a huge dust storm was coming into LBK, seriously they even put a warning on the TV! after I was at home inside, safe from the dirt. I was listening to this song and thought, wow. what a BIG redeeming God we have, that He can and does make beautiful things out of something so worthless and dirty like the dust.
5. after ummm idk, forever!
I've been waiting for this moment.
and the team, that I love finally did it. yessir.
thought I was gonna pee myself.
Dallas Mavericks took care of business. seriously! and I just might name my first kid Jett. don't hate.
5. Me and a few girls at the Rec have started the
Asylum workout program.
It is indeed beyond insane.
Its been rough, but super tight cause we've been working out in the
new Raider Ride spin room= Awesomeness. ka-pow!
6. Just summer in general is making me super happy =) lots of news (as in plural new things) and the routine of class, workout, pool just can't really be beat.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
tuesday morning
I have Tuesday mornings off and its really a beautiful thing. plenty of time to workout, worship, pray and strum a little humm.. This morning my heart is aching for some beautiful faces in Guatemala. and that heartache is simply satifsfied by this: He hold the universe. He holds everyone on earth. so while my heart and prayers may be there, He's so much bigger and IS THERE. so all Im humbled yet again, drawn and in love with our Creator that is big enough to hold every precious child that I can't today.
"For He is before all things, and by Him all things were created and hold together." Colossians 1:18
Friday, May 27, 2011
all things new.
in the struggle. in the waiting. it often seems like forever, never ending. and when the finale comes, well maybe it wasn't so bad. maybe just maybe it was worth the wait. every prayer, every cry, every question, every wondering, every piece of confusion. it was all the worth it. and now I get to sit back and watch Him restore and make something beautiful and most of all new. My heart overflows with joy to know that my God has been and is sovereign. He never let go. and He's so gracious to let us be a part, to catch a glimpse of His goodness. to catch a glimpse of just how beautifully He makes all things new.
and yes, I meant to put the picture of the pineapple.
and yes, I meant to put the picture of the pineapple.sweet moment numero dos. samantha
I just might have to blog twice today. lots of time, quiet time and lots of goodness. But first I want you to meet Samantha.
Samantha lives at Evita's. Evita is a native Guatemalan. She works for Hodgar, the government orphanage and runs a transition home for girls who have aged out of the orphanage or who have children. Yes, she is a beautiful woman with a beautiful heart. and because of her obedience Samantha and her mother Topacio have a safe place to live and grow.
Samantha's mother is 12 years old. Samantha is 18 mos. Samantha's biological father, is also her grandfather. But praise be His, that He makes all things beautiful for His glory. Samantha was a little shy when we first got ready to play, but she sat content. Like most 18 month old kiddos Samantha got a little sleepy and fussy in the afternoon. and Jesus had this moment set just for me, Him and sweet little Samantha. we went upstairs to her room. and yes, I had every intention of laying her down, walking away, and letting her cry a little til she slept. but with that sweet face things were a little different. I got to hold her. sing in her ear songs of worship. Worship to a God that I can trust His sovereignty in every part of my life. and hers. I'm thankful that I serve a God who can be trusted in the midst of what seems so unbearable and horrific. In that quiet room in Antigua Guatemala. I held Samantha, but He held us both. in a beautiful romance, embraced by His love and kindness. and both redeemed because of His greatness.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
laugh.
my dad, whom i love with all my heart has always told me to laugh, enjoy life and laugh even more. he would tickle me and i always thought it torture, cause I oftentimes thought I was going to pee on myself he'd tickle me so hard. then I couldnt breathe. and somewhere in the midst of all that tickling i developed this loud laugh that comes from the pit of my stomach and makes me cry most of the time. its genuine. and it is medicine to the soul. laughter is a universal language of joy. its one of His gifts. and laugh is one of the things I did a lot of in Guatemala. and tickle after tickle of precious orphan children. Especially with one sweet, precious, little girl, orphan named silvia.
Silvia latched on to me the first day we were at cercaif. and of course my heart went out to her.we played and we, well, laughed. she would climb up on my lap and would place my hands on her stomach and kinda of move them and giggle a little to get me to tickle her. as she laughed and laughed squirming her way out of my lap, I caught a glimpse of His goodness. this pattern happened over and over thankfully. Through our tickling sessions I began to think with the Spirit. I prayed that that laughter would be medicine to her soul. and somehow maybe it would last longer than just those few moments. that God would use that laughter to heal the broken places, to let Silvia know of the joy that comes from the Father. and I couldn't help but be thankful for a dad that tickled me countless times as a young girl, with hands that would never harm me, but simply embrace and tickle.
"Laugh and laugh genuinely. there's no sound like laughter, its audible joy. its the music of an abundant heart and ecstatic soul. Laughter hopes. Laughter heals.Laughter connects. and laughter loves unconditionally."
Monday, May 23, 2011
a piece of my heart and all of His
Well this is blog numero uno of many to come on the same topic. and there may or may not be lots of broken spanish in these few to follow. spanish? por que? learning a new language is difficult. it opens your eyes to new understanding. it takes persistence, it takes dedication. and oftentimes there's a lot, a lot of discomfort. So maybe in some ways I've kinda learned a new language. caught a new glimpse of His heart. and I've found it in Guatemala. there with the orphans.
something about Guatemala just clicked with my heart beautifully. the people, the land, it just felt like home a lot of times. My heart was captured and I've fallen madly in love with this place. I'm encouraged by the truth of and faithfulness of His sanctification. Because the truth is when we encounter Him, begin to seek His heart, He does in fact change our heart somehow to look and love as He does.
So this is just the preface: I loved Guatemala. loved my week. several sweet moments surrounded in His glory. so stay tuned in the days to come to read about the stories of these people and of His redemption, grace and His heartbeat.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
the enemy.
I'm just wrapping up finals. last one before I start my last year in college, crazy! So I've been studying in Judges. Trying not to just read the bible, but to actually study it. To know the word in it's entirety. You may be thinking, Judges? what on earth are you going to learn in Judges? Don't worry I often ask myself the same thing. but His word is good, every last bit of it. and I figure if the creator of the universe told someone to write it down, there's got to be some treasures hidden somewhere. So I haven't gotten far into Judges, but enough to be reminded of what a repetitive cycle of sin the Israelites were in. The basics are this: they choose to follow worship God, wander away, worship idols, realize the mess they're in, then cry out to God, then God delivers. It's redemption in it's rawest form. Then you read about all these battles and crazy violence, that God commands and even leads His people in. Why would He want to defeat so many people? I began to think about this more last night, and still kind of chewing on it some today. He's been speaking to my heart in the truth that God Himself wants to destroy our enemy. and the enemy being anything that draws us away from Him. Idols, golden calves, other lovers, whatever it may be. You see in Judges chapter 4, the enemy was from within their own people. A Canaanite king to be exact, oppressing the Israelites, causing them to be led into sin. and what does God do, goes and gets a lady-Deborah, who takes Barak with her to defeat this mess, in the Lord's name. Every time the Lord came through to battle and defeat whatever was in the way of Him and His people.
Be encouraged today my friend. The Lord's enemy, what He's battling against with and for you is anything that might draw you away. He wants to defeat whatever idol or corruption that's within your midst.
"Be still, the Lord will fight for you." Exodus 14:14
Be encouraged today my friend. The Lord's enemy, what He's battling against with and for you is anything that might draw you away. He wants to defeat whatever idol or corruption that's within your midst.
"Be still, the Lord will fight for you." Exodus 14:14
Saturday, May 7, 2011
take your shoes off
hello my few and faithful readers! my goal this summer is to blog once a week or more, exciting huh?!
So I walked into my room the other day after just getting back from a workout, I knew it was some time for some Jesus time. I usually leave my shoes on to help me be more productive the rest of the evening (just one of my many quirks). but this time it was very different. As soon as I began entering into the throne room, I heard so clearly, "take off your shoes" -well that's strange, as much as I hate wearing shoes I usually leave them on a while. But I took em off and just plopped right there on my floor with the word, journal, and some shawn mcdonald. I began pondering why on earth did the Lord ever tell anyone to take off their shoes, because they're on holy ground? seriously what do shoes have anything to do with it? then I got this gem of a thought.....
Maybe He wants us to take off our shoes because He's inviting us into His presence to come, sit and stay a while. Maybe He's inviting us into His mansion and all that He has in store. Maybe He wants us not to be ready to leave that presence so quickly. But instead to sit and glean from Him and to worship the One who is Holy and all He wants is us to take off our shoes and plop it there a while.
so today...take off your shoes, enter into His mansion.
And in the words of John Randles- "get out of the entry way, Go explore and see what He has in His house with many rooms"
All I know of Him I adore and am satisfied, but I know there is still so much more-ad
So I walked into my room the other day after just getting back from a workout, I knew it was some time for some Jesus time. I usually leave my shoes on to help me be more productive the rest of the evening (just one of my many quirks). but this time it was very different. As soon as I began entering into the throne room, I heard so clearly, "take off your shoes" -well that's strange, as much as I hate wearing shoes I usually leave them on a while. But I took em off and just plopped right there on my floor with the word, journal, and some shawn mcdonald. I began pondering why on earth did the Lord ever tell anyone to take off their shoes, because they're on holy ground? seriously what do shoes have anything to do with it? then I got this gem of a thought.....
Maybe He wants us to take off our shoes because He's inviting us into His presence to come, sit and stay a while. Maybe He's inviting us into His mansion and all that He has in store. Maybe He wants us not to be ready to leave that presence so quickly. But instead to sit and glean from Him and to worship the One who is Holy and all He wants is us to take off our shoes and plop it there a while.
so today...take off your shoes, enter into His mansion.
And in the words of John Randles- "get out of the entry way, Go explore and see what He has in His house with many rooms"
All I know of Him I adore and am satisfied, but I know there is still so much more-ad
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
jonah.
"we're young men of joppa of joppa of joppa. we're young men of joppa who sailed the high seas" a children's musical was one of the many ways that I heard the story of Jonah and the big fish growing up. pretty sure I could tell you the story in my sleep. but have i taken this for granted? I guess some where in my ideal picture perfect world I thought everyone heard those stories. I mean how do you get past 5 and not hear that story and noah?! and esther? too. tonight i was kind of snapped to reality.
I'm at work. 5-9 shift. the most boring one ever. caught up on school stuff. starving. luckily the Lord likes to make life always interesting and full. so we're chatting. me and the guy a work with. just about life. (we've had some good full talks lately its been cool to watch God open those doors.) then I started relating an issue in my life to the story of jonah. i said 'you know the story of jonah and the big fish?' nothin. not a nod, not a maybe. i hope my jaw didn't drop to the floor. I proceeded to tell him the story. listening to myself, i thought, 'wow, it does take faith to believe this stuff.' then we talked about old and new testament. theology. the gospel. childhood. church. truth. it was beautiful. The Spirit has been urging me to take this opportunity on this shift. and today. it happened. then we got into the church talk, I was both encouraged and challenged. he said yea, me and my roommate always say we're going to go to church on sunday. my thought=really? non-church goers think that? we are we at? how easy is it to speak truth and invite people in to enjoy reality.
enjoy the irony here. quit being like jonah and running from what God has called you to do or to say. that everyone may hear truth.
I'm at work. 5-9 shift. the most boring one ever. caught up on school stuff. starving. luckily the Lord likes to make life always interesting and full. so we're chatting. me and the guy a work with. just about life. (we've had some good full talks lately its been cool to watch God open those doors.) then I started relating an issue in my life to the story of jonah. i said 'you know the story of jonah and the big fish?' nothin. not a nod, not a maybe. i hope my jaw didn't drop to the floor. I proceeded to tell him the story. listening to myself, i thought, 'wow, it does take faith to believe this stuff.' then we talked about old and new testament. theology. the gospel. childhood. church. truth. it was beautiful. The Spirit has been urging me to take this opportunity on this shift. and today. it happened. then we got into the church talk, I was both encouraged and challenged. he said yea, me and my roommate always say we're going to go to church on sunday. my thought=really? non-church goers think that? we are we at? how easy is it to speak truth and invite people in to enjoy reality.
enjoy the irony here. quit being like jonah and running from what God has called you to do or to say. that everyone may hear truth.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
by His mercy.
life has been crazy fast since spring break. sometimes i like that and sometimes i just need a little slow down and 'whoa buddy' This past week i got a little more details on my trip with Orphan outreach to Guatemala and I got new luggage tags :) so when i read the trip details i got a little emotional. here's why.... so in the past year or so the Lord has been stirring this passion in my heart for teenage girls, young women and just for His daughters in general. I wasn't and am still not certain what all He plans to do with that passion, but I know its big. and I know its not another ministry for the spiritual "healthy" In being awakened to that passion, I've questioned my current location and current path of study, I've tried to be open, even if He called me to quit school or something crazy. but I haven't felt that leading. when I got the details of the trip, He affirmed every little bit of work that He's been at in my life. Our trip will include visits to 3 different orphanages. we will be working on different life skills, such as cooking and self care. we will also be working with a transitional home where a lovely woman has 8 teenage girls. are you pickin up on His perfection in all this?! 1) i love any and all kids 2) i love working with teenage girls 3) my major has a huge emphasis on leading groups and teaching individuals to be independent in self care and living skills!!! can i get an amen?! and the cherry on top: there's a special needs group in one of the orphanges, which my education has prepared me even more for. ahh beautiful, just beautiful. and the one thing that must be said...its only by His mercy. "It does not, therefore, depend on man's desire or effort, but on God's merccy. For the scripture says to pharaoh, "I raised you up for this very purpose, that I might display my power in you and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth. " Romans 9:16-17
Monday, March 28, 2011
because You were born.
without your life, my entrance to this world would've been much different.
I might not have learned to read, talk, sing or tie my shoe quite so soon.
my understanding of love and mercy would be simply from some old story
and I'm not sure who's number I would dial on those rough days.
I don't know who would stand in the gap, praying without ceasing.
who would see the depth of my heart and love me for who He's made me.
I've laughed at you often, but laughed with you more.
you've shown compassion, patience, love. despite where you've been
you've discipled and taught truths from His word. You've given me a sneek peek to His ways
I've seen His love for the least of these by how you make them your life.
I'm not sure I would fully understand knowing mercy and grace without knowing you
thank you for being a woman who fears the Lord and speaks wisdom and truth into my life. I love you more than you know and I am beyond blessed by your life. Looking forward to the years to come and the glory He will reveal through you.
Happy Birthday Mom!
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
forever thankful
six years ago tomorrow. a skinny high school boy skipped soccer practice to see me. that event started this crazy journey and a still wonderful friendship. there are few events in your life that have such a huge impact, for me this one ranks about 2 or 3. and I just want to be able to testify of how God has brought forth His glory. in six years i've learned to bear burdens, to deeply love another child of the King. He's molded me to be merciful and show grace, which if you know me that is sooo not my first nature. He's brought me to choose to be obedient no matter the cost. to share in suffering and even still to be joyful in affliction. to truly be still and wait for the Lord, to just simply be patient. I've learned to live and enjoy the blessings. to know the truth that He is sovereign and seated on His throne today and tomorrow and forever. fighting the flesh to listen to His command to do everything without selfish ambition. amidst it all the Kingdom and the gospel must never be put on hold. there's been laughter, tears, hurt, acceptance, rejection, silence, fear, and uncertainties but of this I am certain He has used every part to mold me .Philippians 1:6 in action. and for that I am forever thankful.
so my few blog friends. what is one of those BIG, ongoing or short events in your life that He has used? Give Him glory for it today, because I'm convinced He's probably using it or has used to change you.
"our hope is not that our circumstances will change soon, but that He is using them to change us."
so my few blog friends. what is one of those BIG, ongoing or short events in your life that He has used? Give Him glory for it today, because I'm convinced He's probably using it or has used to change you.
"our hope is not that our circumstances will change soon, but that He is using them to change us."
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
i'm bbaaacckk.
so sorry I've been kinda M.I.A. lately. just school, DNOWs, Spring Break and well blogging just kinda gets pushed out. but it's time to get back in the game. its march, which means march madness, heck yes! love it. duke is gonna take it all. just callin that right now. Ok, so you remember that series I started "Fridays with Josh" well i wasn't so good at that, but I did finish the book of Joshua, today actually. quite beautiful, seriously. So just to hit the highlights that I thought were just rockin. 1) the good book says that every good promises that the Lord made to Israel was fulfilled, not one, not one was left unfulfilled. how stinkin sick and encouraging is that! not one promise was left unfulfilled. let that truth ring in your heart and mind today. keeping in mind that the Israelites had to get outta Egypt wander in the desert and battle before they were all fulfilled. but even still they knew and saw His faithfulness and for that 2) they chose to worship Him. Joshua tells his peeps, "choose this day whom you will serve." and i know you've probably heard this verse over and over. but check this out in the last chapter of josh. the boy joshua tells them consider the Lord and choose. then, this is huge. He instructs them to put away anything of the former life, idols, etc...sounds a lot like the call on our life as born again believers. we must put away the former things. and choose. to serve Him. and worship Him only, because He is faithful.
and in our unfaithful moments, His faithfulness declares its constancy. -amd (this one not the other)
speaking of the other amd (the lil bro man). he had a show at the Prophet Bar in Deep Ellum, kinda a big deal. he was pumped. and so was I. coolest part of the show was the intro. they played this "nightlights" by jimmy needham. just making it clear who the show was for. "because applause is a poor form of soul medication." can i just say i stinkin love my brother's heart. I'll never forget one of our chats about music. he told me, "ashley, I'm just scared that if my music ever goes big and I get a recording label, I'll become prideful." just pure honesty and truth of the flesh. but by the Spirit he is (we can) overcome the flesh. and I just can't wait to see all the work that bust out through that kid.
that's all for now.
peace and wreck 'em.
and in our unfaithful moments, His faithfulness declares its constancy. -amd (this one not the other)
speaking of the other amd (the lil bro man). he had a show at the Prophet Bar in Deep Ellum, kinda a big deal. he was pumped. and so was I. coolest part of the show was the intro. they played this "nightlights" by jimmy needham. just making it clear who the show was for. "because applause is a poor form of soul medication." can i just say i stinkin love my brother's heart. I'll never forget one of our chats about music. he told me, "ashley, I'm just scared that if my music ever goes big and I get a recording label, I'll become prideful." just pure honesty and truth of the flesh. but by the Spirit he is (we can) overcome the flesh. and I just can't wait to see all the work that bust out through that kid.
that's all for now.
peace and wreck 'em.
Sunday, January 23, 2011
james1:27
I love how He uses the whole body. every part to accomplish His work. My heart's been aching for this kind of work for a while now. Because the truth is He calls us. commands us. to be a part. to love and to serve. to have compassion. to make sacrifices. to give. I've committed to give up 8 days of my short little summer break to go with orphan outreach to Guatemala. Our team will be serving in the local orphanages and sharing the gospel with those there. and the part I'm most excited about is bringing hope to those that have been and are still hopeless. The Word calls the Holy Spirit within each of us "the hope of glory." we have hope in Jesus Christ. obviously i'm one poor poor college student. just a humble and willing heart that needs your help. asking you to pray about using the resources He's given you, to help bring hope to the hopeless.
All I ask is that you pray, search your heart. Do whatever it is He is calling you to do. so that we as the body might be part of building His kingdom and welcoming more into His great redemption story.
and once He tells you to give :) Here's what you do!
Go to orphan outreach to make a donation
or...
Make checks payable to Orphan Outreach
(Trip code:GU11-05IDV participant: Ashley Davidson)
you can mail it to:
2001 West Plano Parkway Suite 3700, Plano TX 75075
or
Ashley Davidson 536A N.Brentwood Lubbock TX 79416
Thank you in advance for being a part of His work!
All I ask is that you pray, search your heart. Do whatever it is He is calling you to do. so that we as the body might be part of building His kingdom and welcoming more into His great redemption story.
and once He tells you to give :) Here's what you do!
Go to orphan outreach to make a donation
or...
Make checks payable to Orphan Outreach
(Trip code:GU11-05IDV participant: Ashley Davidson)
you can mail it to:
2001 West Plano Parkway Suite 3700, Plano TX 75075
or
Ashley Davidson 536A N.Brentwood Lubbock TX 79416
Thank you in advance for being a part of His work!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
all. for good.
ok so if you haven't seen this movie. stop reading this and go. now!
so the scene here. Eustace (the annoying cousin) was tempted by the treasure of gold and was cursed by his choice and was turned into a dragon. miserable huh?! kinda how things are with us we seek after things of this world then sin brings on the consequences and sometimes turns us into ugly monsters. but God knowing all things works for the good. in all things. you see Eustace, because he became a dragon was able to help pull the ship to face the terrible green mist (evil). He was able to return the 7th and final sword to the table, to make all things right. You see God knows when our mess ups can bring Him lots of glory, therefore He allows it. and even better He heals and restores us from those mess-ups. Obviously Eustace doesn't stay a dragon the rest of his life.
I'll leave you with this line. chew on this a bit. how beautiful it is that indeed He works all things together for good....... He says, "no matter how hard I tried I couldn't change, then He came towards me. it hurt, but it was a good pain, like pulling a thorn out of your foot."
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
today.
all of my best girl friends are between the ages of 20-23. love them all. the Lord has blessed for sure. their hearts are beautiful. some are married. some practically married. others just dating. while some are practically dating someone. and then there's us single ladies! I'm sure you would never guess that there's often talks of "someday" let me explain.
we share pretty much everything with each other. I believe its a lot like how God intended for us to do life with each other, sharpening each other, just as iron sharpens iron. we talk about fears, hopes, dreams, embarrassing things, heartache, healing moments, laughter, and even the little things that don't always seem to matter. Oftentimes someone is sayin "someday my husband and I..." or "someday when I have a real job..." "someday when I adopt kids..." yes we're girls. yes we dream of what society has fed us in happily ever afters. but we also put the "spiritual" spin on it. I mean don't get me wrong, its exciting and there is a time for these things, such as, praying with our husband every morning, going on mission trips with our own families, teaching our daughters how much Jesus loves them, tossing the football with our boys among the blessings He's given (ok so maybe that's just me and Kaylan's dream!) showing our kids and their friends how good God is.. the list goes on. Lately God has convicted me with this kind of chat.
I'm a girl ready for adventure. battle. crazy risk. out of the box. doing the out of the ordinary. going against the grain. Godly rebellion. and most of the time (99.9999%) of the time I think I'll do all that when maybe someday I'm married and have a husband to lead and battle with me. and yes, I believe God has a beautiful role of the man in a woman's life. however, I cannot miss what He's called me to do today as a single woman of the Lord. and duh somethings are bound to change in marriage,but how glorious it will be for my husband to step in and lead, and me be prepared for battle cause I've been fighting the battles He's called me to today.
The Spirit keeps asking me this question, "If you're not doing it today, what makes you think you're going to do it then?"
What are you waiting for? jump in and battle. give. live abundantly. proclaim the gospel. pray continually. dig in the word. pour into those around you. invest time for eternity. go out on a limb. go see this world, and the work He did outside of Texas! put those spiritual gifts to work. love your neighbors. love this beautiful gift of life He's given, but not more than you love Him. (btw, those are all to me)
"God said to Joshua, today I'll make you great in the eyes of Israel. they'll see that I am with you just as I was with Moses" Joshua 3:7
we share pretty much everything with each other. I believe its a lot like how God intended for us to do life with each other, sharpening each other, just as iron sharpens iron. we talk about fears, hopes, dreams, embarrassing things, heartache, healing moments, laughter, and even the little things that don't always seem to matter. Oftentimes someone is sayin "someday my husband and I..." or "someday when I have a real job..." "someday when I adopt kids..." yes we're girls. yes we dream of what society has fed us in happily ever afters. but we also put the "spiritual" spin on it. I mean don't get me wrong, its exciting and there is a time for these things, such as, praying with our husband every morning, going on mission trips with our own families, teaching our daughters how much Jesus loves them, tossing the football with our boys among the blessings He's given (ok so maybe that's just me and Kaylan's dream!) showing our kids and their friends how good God is.. the list goes on. Lately God has convicted me with this kind of chat.
I'm a girl ready for adventure. battle. crazy risk. out of the box. doing the out of the ordinary. going against the grain. Godly rebellion. and most of the time (99.9999%) of the time I think I'll do all that when maybe someday I'm married and have a husband to lead and battle with me. and yes, I believe God has a beautiful role of the man in a woman's life. however, I cannot miss what He's called me to do today as a single woman of the Lord. and duh somethings are bound to change in marriage,but how glorious it will be for my husband to step in and lead, and me be prepared for battle cause I've been fighting the battles He's called me to today.
The Spirit keeps asking me this question, "If you're not doing it today, what makes you think you're going to do it then?"
What are you waiting for? jump in and battle. give. live abundantly. proclaim the gospel. pray continually. dig in the word. pour into those around you. invest time for eternity. go out on a limb. go see this world, and the work He did outside of Texas! put those spiritual gifts to work. love your neighbors. love this beautiful gift of life He's given, but not more than you love Him. (btw, those are all to me)
"God said to Joshua, today I'll make you great in the eyes of Israel. they'll see that I am with you just as I was with Moses" Joshua 3:7
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